It has been a long journey arriving here, where I am now...not just my physical address, but my mental and spiritual state as well. I have been down some long roads, some because of decisions I made, and some at the hands of others.
I've been divorced, twice, and remarried. Getting divorced is easy, Being divorced...not so much. The first time I divorced was simply because my husband decided he didn't have to work and help take care of us, and to be truthful, I had the personality of the spoiled princess that felt I didn't deserve such horrible conditions....no one had explained to me yet that when you marry, you both lay down your so-called rights. The second time I divorced was strange really. I had a good friend that helped me out a lot after my first marriage ended, then one evening he fixed dinner for me and my kids, and the next thing you know we were engaged. We had a great marriage really, but he decided he couldn't handle having little kids....I don't guess it ever crossed his mind that they would grow up someday.....I was single a long time, very cautious about getting married again. In the time in between God began to show me the areas in my life that needed some work. I don't think I every "left" God, but I will say that my relationship with Him deepened. One night while I was praying I said to God that if He wanted me to have another spouse or date another person that He would just have to plant them right in the path in front of me.....the next day at my job, He did just that! I met what would be my husband, that day. We started dating and 6 months later we married. We have had some rough patches, you always do when you come into a marriage with past baggage. God by His spirit really worked in my heart and life. It seems He transformed all that was the old Regina, and gave me a renewed mind, a refreshed spirit, sometimes it seems my personality is not even the same. My husband and I have grown in God in the time we have been together (6 years just this past September). We feel we have both repented of the mistakes we have made and I know in my heart that God was just to forgive us, to cleanse us, and to make us new. No longer do I have a life filled with bitterness and hardness, but feel I have a tender spirit, a heart of grace and mercy. My goals in life changed....I want my life to please God first, then my husband....I remember those early years when I was married, I will tell you that was certainly not my heart. I want my children to learn from my example what it means to be a Godly wife and mother, the keeper of the home, the help mate, how to love your husband. I have done so many things, a lot I am not proud of, but the God I serve is a restorer....He can take a broken life, marred by what you think is the deepest of sins, and He can wash is it clean and make it brand new. He can heal where life has left deep wounds and scars, places in your life that you would never reveal to another soul, He cares about those places, I know because I experienced His tender loving care as He healed wound after wound in my spirit and in my life.
Through all of this i I would hear the voice of God directing my steps, and sometimes, I ran.....but through it all His love remained, He never left my side, He carried me when I couldn't carry myself. This journey has had a lot of twists and turns, but I wouldn't change it....the journey is what made me who I am today. The trials shaped me, the paths brought out character flaws that needed to be dealt with. I am a better woman because of this journey. I love where I am today! God gave me gift to speak to the hearts of people and I love it! It flows perfectly with the other things He has blessed me with....It was His idea laid on my heart to begin to blog....I am so glad you are on this journey with me....let's keep moving forward, enjoying every minute of our travels...