Monday, January 14, 2013

Day 5....Winners and Losers

Make my joy complete by being like-minded,
having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.
Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,
not looking to your own interests but each of you
to the interests of the others.
~ Philippians 2:2-4
 How does this relate to our marriage relationships? That is what we want to look at today and how that relates to our communication in marriage. 

Many times I have heard women talk about "winning" an argument with their spouse. We want to be "right" regardless of the damages that may occur in the process. But, when it comes to marriage, we are both on the same team, so their are no winners or losers. It's one thing to want your opinion to be understood, but, we confuse that with the need to be right at times....those are two different things. 

We have to be willing to extend grace and mercy to each other...remember day 1, we are both flawed people only redeemed by the grace of God. Someone has to take the high road, someone has to drop out of the argument and go to God with it in prayer, in doing so we let go of our anger and our need to be right.

Today's Vow: To Give Up My Need to Be Right
The Challenge: Let your voice be heard, but put down any weapons of warfare. Practice holding your tongue when you're angry and carrying your burdens to prayer.

 Remember, that while we have the best intentions of taking these challenges, we are still very much a work in progress. We make mistakes, but don't let that make you stop trying to take steps to improve your marriage....

Be Blessed!


  1. Ouch! This is a tough one for me. I HAVE to be right, but you're correct- my husband and I are a team. I needed this "check," thank you!

    1. This is tough one, I's in our nature I guess to try to "win
      everything....but in a marriage we are team players on the same can do it Elisabet!

  2. As the last time I am not in a marriage but this does apply to many other relationships. I find myself annoyed when someone questions what I say. Praying about it definite would be better than getting angry inside. Thanks for sharing.

    1. I agree Gladys, we can use the things we learn about relationships and apply it to other relationships that we have, a lot of this advice is useful in many different areas in life. Thanks for reading! The Ultimate Vow is a 21 day challenge, but after that the posts will not just be about marriage...hope you will keep reading