A Tragedy and Tips for Coping with Holiday Stress and Depression

Yesterday afternoon I found out about a tragedy that affected our local high school and students both past and present. My heart was so heavy for this young girls parents and family. I so badly wanted to help in some way......so today I am posting some tips from the Mayo clinic for dealing with holiday stress and depression. If this applies to you today, do not hesitate to reach out to someone and talk with them about what you are feeling. If you are the one that someone chooses to reach out to, please take the time to listen with an open mind, and do not judge, let them know they are not alone. Here is the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline number if anyone needs it....1-800-273-8255

Stress, depression and the holidays: Tips for coping

 

1. Acknowledge your feelings. If someone close to you has recently died or you can't be with loved ones, realize that it's normal to feel sadness and grief. It's OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can't force yourself to be happy just because it's the holiday season.
2. Reach out. If you feel lonely or isolated, seek out community, religious or other social events. They can offer support and companionship. Volunteering your time to help others also is a good way to lift your spirits and broaden your friendships.
3. Be realistic. The holidays don't have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. For example, if your adult children can't come to your house, find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails or videos.
4. Set aside differences. Try to accept family members and friends as they are, even if they don't live up to all of your expectations. Set aside grievances until a more appropriate time for discussion. And be understanding if others get upset or distressed when something goes awry. Chances are they're feeling the effects of holiday stress and depression, too.
5. Stick to a budget. Before you go gift and food shopping, decide how much money you can afford to spend. Then stick to your budget. Don't try to buy happiness with an avalanche of gifts. Try these alternatives: Donate to a charity in someone's name, give homemade gifts or start a family gift exchange.
6. Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, baking, visiting friends and other activities. Plan your menus and then make your shopping list. That'll help prevent last-minute scrambling to buy forgotten ingredients. And make sure to line up help for party prep and cleanup.
7. Learn to say no. Saying yes when you should say no can leave you feeling resentful and overwhelmed. Friends and colleagues will understand if you can't participate in every project or activity. If it's not possible to say no when your boss asks you to work overtime, try to remove something else from your agenda to make up for the lost time.
8. Don't abandon healthy habits. Don't let the holidays become a free-for-all. Overindulgence only adds to your stress and guilt. Have a healthy snack before holiday parties so that you don't go overboard on sweets, cheese or drinks. Continue to get plenty of sleep and physical activity.
9. Take a breather. Make some time for yourself. Spending just 15 minutes alone, without distractions, may refresh you enough to handle everything you need to do. Take a walk at night and stargaze. Listen to soothing music. Find something that reduces stress by clearing your mind, slowing your breathing and restoring inner calm.
10. Seek professional help if you need it. Despite your best efforts, you may find yourself feeling persistently sad or anxious, plagued by physical complaints, unable to sleep, irritable and hopeless, and unable to face routine chores. If these feelings last for a while, talk to your doctor or a mental health professional.

And as always I am glad to listen to you via email if that's what it takes...you can email me directly at frank_n_regina@yahoo.com

 Regina 

 

Why I Hate Religion, But Love Jesus

I read this on my facebook profile.....I didn't write it, but I do agree with it. This poem sums up for me my feelings on why we need to have a personal, intimate relationship with Jesus. This was posted on The Soul Doctor facebook page.

  WHY I HATE RELIGION, BUT LOVE JESUS

What if I told you Jesus came to abolish religion?
What if I told you voting Republican really wasn't His mission
What if I told you republican doesn't automatically mean Christian
And just because you call some people blind doesn't automatically give you vision

I mean if religion is so great, why has it started so many wars
Why does it build huge churches, but fails to feed the poor
Tells single moms God doesn't love them if they've ever had a divorce
But in the Old Testament, God actually calls religious people whores

Religion might preach grace, but another thing they practice
Tend to ridicule God's people, they did it to John The Baptist
They can't fix their problems, and so they just mask it
Not realizing religion's like spraying perfume on a casket
See the problem with religion, is it never gets to the core
It's just behavior modification, like a long list of chores
Like let's dress up the outside make it look nice and neat
But it's funny that's what they use to do to mummies while the corpse rots underneath

Now I ain't judging, I'm just saying quit putting on a fake look
Cause there's a problem if people only know you're a Christian by your Facebook
I mean in every other aspect of life, you know that logic's unworthy
It's like saying you play for the Lakers just because you bought a jersey
You see this was me too, but no one seemed to be on to me
Acting like a church kid, while addicted to pornography
See on Sunday I'd go to church, but Saturday getting faded
Acting if I was simply created just to have sex and get wasted
See I spent my whole life building this facade of neatness
But now that I know Jesus, I boast in my weakness

Because if grace is water, then the church should be an ocean
It's not a museum for good people, it's a hospital for the broken
Which means I don't have to hide my failure, I don't have to hide my sin
Because it doesn't depend on me it depends on him
See because when I was God's enemy and certainly not a fan
He looked down and said I want, that, man
Which is why Jesus hated religion, and for it he called them fools
Don't you see so much better than just following some rules
Now let me clarify, I love the church, I love the Bible, and yes I believe in sin
But if Jesus came to your church would they actually let him in
See remember he was called a glutton, and a drunkard by religious men
But the Son of God never supports self righteousness not now, not then

Now back to the point, one thing is vital to mention
How Jesus and religion are on opposite spectrum
See one's the work of God, but one's a man made invention
See one is the cure, but the other's the infection
See because religion says do, Jesus says done
Religion says slave, Jesus says son
Religion puts you in bondage, while Jesus sets you free
Religion makes you blind, but Jesus makes you see
And that's why religion and Jesus are two different clans

Religion is man searching for God, Christianity is God searching for man
Which is why salvation is freely mine, and forgiveness is my own
Not based on my merits but Jesus's obedience alone
Because He took the crown of thorns, and the blood dripped down His face
He took what we all deserved, I guess that's why you call it grace
And while being murdered He yelled
"Father forgive them they know not what they do."
Because when He was dangling on that cross, He was thinking of you
And He absorbed all of your sin, and buried it in the tomb
Which is why I'm kneeling at the cross, saying come on there's room
So for religion, no I hate it, in fact I literally resent it
Because when Jesus said it is finished, I believe He meant it.

- Jefferson Bethke

Keeping First Things First

This week, a fellow blogger that I read daily, put out a post stating that she needed a break from blogging and that she would be back in 2013. She said she needed to look after the needs of her family, pray about the direction of her blog, etc...In other words, she needed to reassess her priorities.

It's easy to do, isn't it? Lose sight of what is really important in life. We have probably all been guilty of this. Life gets busy, demands on our time never cease, children need constant attention....at the end of the day we are spent! After this cycle of demands go on for a time, we start to feel out of sorts....with ourselves, with others, with our spouse, our children...it seems we have no time for our prayer time with God. I can tell you from my own experience that when I get so busy with life and neglect my devotional time with God, that I begin to feel overwhelmed....I begin to look for peace for my spirit, for my emotions, for my home. There is a song that says, "the only real peace I have dear Lord is in You!"  I have to remember that, I have to re-align my priorities to match His. I have found that when my life is in order as described in Scripture, that everything else falls into place. 

During the holiday season, life seems to get very hectic for people....Christmas parties, programs, special services, visits, cooking, shopping, baking, planning....the list goes on! As you go about your tasks this month leading up to Christmas, remember to check your heart.....are you putting Christ first in all that you do? Are you following His voice, taking on the tasks that He gives you, and passing on the ones that you feel He is directing you to not do? It may seem odd to you at first, but I can tell you that placing God first, listening to His voice, following His lead, will bring you real peace.....  

Be Blessed!
Regina